9. Total destruction in 30 minutes or the next one is free.
8. Often mistaken for the Wrath of God.
7. We kill foreigners so you don't have to.
6. If everything is exploding around you, that's probably us.
5. Dictator got you down? Ask about our new "regime change" policy!
4. Just point at what you want dead.
3. Trying to win hearts and minds, but willing to splatter them if necessary.
2. When it absolutely positively has to be destroyed overnight.
1. We're from the Government, and we're here to kill you.
Hat Tip Theospark.